Four Commitments That Quietly Steal Your Best Work

Burnout hides in the almost-right commitments.

You don’t wear down from obvious overload. You wear down from well-meaning additions that quietly erode your rhythms.

After DMS scaled from 2 events per year to 159, I learned something counterintuitive: growth doesn’t come from adding more. It comes from protecting what matters.

One January, still riding the momentum of a record-breaking season, I was invited to lead a high-profile community initiative. It felt prestigious. It aligned with my values. But when I laid it against my actual capacity and the mission I’d already committed to, the answer became clear. This was a distraction dressed as an opportunity.

Saying no felt risky. What if people thought I wasn’t committed? What if the opportunity never came back? But I’d learned the hard way that January is when burnout sneaks in—not from obvious overload, but from well-meaning additions that quietly erode your rhythms.

So I declined. And instead of loss, I gained focus. That clarity freed up energy I didn’t even know I had. The following year, we hosted 192 events—something we never thought possible.

Excellence isn’t about filling every gap. It’s about knowing which gaps to leave empty.

The Almost-Right Things

January burnout rarely comes from doing too much of the wrong things. It comes from doing too much of the almost-right things. The commitments that look good on paper but quietly steal the margin you need to do your best work.

Here are four types worth examining before your calendar fills again.

Commitments born from obligation, not invitation.

The most dangerous commitments aren’t the ones forced on you—they’re the ones you accept because you feel you should. Serving on a committee because “someone has to.” Taking on a project because saying no feels irresponsible. These obligations masquerade as duty, but they lack the life-giving quality of true invitation.

Research confirms this intuition. People who perform tasks aligned with their intrinsic motivations report significantly higher satisfaction and lower emotional exhaustion than those driven primarily by external expectations.¹ The same principle applies beyond the workplace. When your calendar is shaped by obligation rather than calling, even good work becomes draining.

Ask yourself: Which commitments did I accept because I was invited into something meaningful—and which did I accept because I felt I had no choice?

Commitments that drain energy without producing fruit.

Some activities consume time and attention but yield little of lasting value. They create the illusion of productivity while quietly depleting your capacity for work that actually matters. The meetings that could have been emails. The projects that duplicate efforts elsewhere. The roles that keep you busy but not effective.

One study found that knowledge workers spend an average of 41% of their time on discretionary activities that offer little personal satisfaction and could be handled competently by others.² That’s a staggering percentage of wasted capacity—capacity you need to do your best work.

The question isn’t whether the work is good. The question is whether it’s producing fruit in proportion to the energy it demands.

Commitments that crowd out what you’re uniquely called to do.

Every yes carries an implicit no to something else. When you fill your schedule with commitments that others could handle just as well, you’re saying no to the work only you can do. This is the quiet tragedy of the overcommitted leader: they’re so busy being helpful that they never become essential.

Peter Drucker understood this when he wrote that effectiveness requires concentration—doing first things first and second things not at all.³ Your unique contribution doesn’t come from doing everything decently. It comes from protecting the space to do a few things with excellence.

Before January fills up again, identify the work that reflects your strengths, calling, and strategic priorities. Then ruthlessly eliminate anything that crowds it out.

Commitments you keep from guilt, not conviction.

Perhaps the most insidious commitments are the ones you’ve outgrown but can’t seem to release. You stay because leaving feels like failure. You continue because you don’t want to disappoint anyone. But guilt is a terrible foundation for sustained excellence.

Brené Brown speaks directly to this tension: setting boundaries requires courage—the courage to love ourselves even when we risk disappointing others.⁴ Guilt-driven commitments don’t just drain you. They prevent others from stepping into roles where they might thrive.

If you’re staying out of guilt rather than conviction, you’re not serving anyone well—including yourself.

A Different Kind of January

January doesn’t have to mean burnout. But avoiding it requires more than better time management or optimized routines. It requires the courage to subtract—to name the commitments that no longer serve your calling and let them go.

The work will continue. Someone else will step in. And you’ll reclaim the margin you need to do what you’re uniquely called to do—with clarity, focus, and joy.

What’s one commitment you’re keeping from obligation, depletion, displacement, or guilt—and what would it look like to release it before January begins?

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¹Edward L. Deci and Richard M. Ryan, “The ‘What’ and ‘Why’ of Goal Pursuits: Human Needs and the Self-Determination of Behavior,” Psychological Inquiry 11, no. 4 (2000): 227–268.

²Julian Birkinshaw and Jordan Cohen, “Make Time for the Work That Matters,” Harvard Business Review, September 2013.

³Peter F. Drucker, The Effective Executive (New York: HarperBusiness, 2006).[^4]: Brené Brown, Daring Greatly (New York: Avery, 2012).

⁴Brené Brown, Daring Greatly (New York: Avery, 2012).